Experience the Words. Feel the Peace. Live your Life.

Thursday, March 29, 2012

Held

What is it like to feel safe in someone’s arms,
Removed from all evils and out of reach of harm?
At war with my soul, I fight here in pain,
Struggling and striking my heart under a cloud of bitter rain.
I’m afraid of the choices and what they might do,
They tear at my mind and cut me right through.
I’m afraid of what may come when all is done
Will I be covered in scorn or shrouded by the sun?
I’m afraid of the things I know people will say
If I give away my life for another, what will become of each day?
Mocked and ridiculed, lying under bricks
And the farther away I go, the more I rely on Satan’s tricks.
Wrapping me around his finger, with a grin so sly
Following the widened trail, not even giving me time to cry.
Struck by the drastic change in the plot of events
Running from the One whom breathed and from heaven life was sent.
I can feel Him there though, watching me so close
And I’m burdened by His eyes ,of which I fear the most.
I fear His judgment and to me what it will bring
But no matter where I am to my soul he’ll always cling.
I want to end it, finally flee from this all
My God, you’ve forsaken me! Why don’t you hear my call?!
Screaming on the inside, falling short of death of self
I cry to the heavens and pull the beads from the shelf.
Heart bleeding in loss, I fall to the ground
Realizing in my heart that His love is all around.
The way I’d always wanted to be held so close,
And I looked to the stars and the answer is in front of my eyes, the one that I chose.
Choking back tears, fingers flying past the beads
Shaking as I turn to Him, allowing Him to lead.
He never did forsake me, not once did He leave me
For the moments I felt down the most, He could always see.
I look back on the choices and He’s not there
I search for Him through it all, but He can’t be found anywhere.
But when I look in the mirror, and see the tears
He’s standing there beside me, taking away my fears.
Following Him on this earth is so difficult
And with that path always comes pain and insult.
But look at my God, walking along the road
Covered in blood and spit and carrying my sins as His load.
With His help, with Him holding me
I can do anything; I can set myself free.
No more running, no more will I hide,
Rather will I follow Him and in His love abide.

2 comments:

  1. You're quite the poet Jessica! Abe Lincoln loved poetry too. His favorite poem was one I know you'll love, if you haven't already read it. It's called "Mortality" by a Scot named William Knox. Abe dearly wished he could have written it; Abe would send his poems to a friend for his critic. Here's one of mine that you might like.

    Sonnet to God
    Musing on life long journey past,
    Its countless circumstances seem to fade
    And blur, and with a heavy heart I sigh;
    Both good and ill obscure in mist and shade.
    I cannot peacefully evaluate
    The multitude of thoughts and words and deeds,
    Which now, to count or change, is far too late;
    It is the fabric I have woven for my needs.
    With spirits sinking, grieved, distressed and blue,
    I suddenly recall where true hope lies;
    Not in what I've done, but just in You!
    Then joyfully my soul to Your Heart flies!
    Your "secret plan" to me
    once more made known,
    Mercy Divine will bring me
    to Your Throne.

    Best wishes
    Elizabeth

    ReplyDelete
  2. PS: In my Sonnet to God, there's an error in the first line, which should be "life's long journey past..." I wrote this on time when I was "musing" on the disturbing absence of sterling values, in my live, such as might stand the testing of the Divine Gold Smith. In his latter years, Michaelangelo arrived at a similar contemplation, which inspired his magnificent sonnet entitled, "To Love Divine. It starts out
    "Well nigh the voyage now is over past,
    And my frail bark, through troubled seas and rude,
    Draws near...." etc.
    lacking his genius, I still attempted to express a similar vein of thought. For a real treat, check out his marvelous poetry and notice the profound faith and devotion to God brilliantly radiating through.

    O yes, your ending was moving... well done!
    "No more running, no more will I hide;
    Rather will I follow Him, and in His love abide."
    I'm copying that in my journal and I say,
    Stick to it my dear... its the perfect formula for happiness in this valley of tears.

    Well Jessica, you did say, "feel FREE to comment!" even with an exclamation point.

    Best wishes,
    Elizabeth

    ReplyDelete

Feel free to comment! I'm always open to listen to what people have to say!